10/30: Embarassing Moment

Describe your most embarrassing moment.

High school was essentially just one giant awkward moment for me. I was constantly falling, tripping, getting caught on things, etc. and ALWAYS in front of someone.


There was this one time I tripped and fell three times in about 10 seconds in front of 600 people. Or the time I slipped in a puddle during my very first high school foot ball game in front of two cute boys from church and came up with what looked like tiger claw marks going up my thigh. Or the time I tried to look cool in front of the very same boys at camp that summer and hopped over a rope like it was nothing, only to get my back foot caught in it and fall straight on my face.

But no, I don't consider those my worst. At all.

I was a cheerleader my freshman year.

That's it.

I'm just kidding, but really. It was the most embarrassing experience as a whole.

One night was particularly bad.

We were in Portland, TN, in the middle of nowhere, but for some reason the stands were full. Three things happened...

1. My stunt group tried to do a basket-toss and one base was super strong and the other was weak and the flier ended up flying over the weak ones head and I barely caught her shoulders and fell to the ground with her.

2. During half time on the field, we were doing a cheer that required us to stunt. A different flier decided to just sit down on my head instead of cradling which ended with our entire group on the floor and me sobbing like a baby walking off the field because I was pretty sure my back was broken (clearly wasn't thinking about the fact I was walking off the field).

3. After sitting on the sidelines the rest of the game due to my presumably broken back, we won and the cheerleaders were going out on the field for the obligatory and awkward post-game hand smack down the line ritual. Portland didn't have a gate to get out to the field so we had to climb over the fence. Every other cheerleader had gone and made it look simple so I hopped on over, only to have the bench I was supposed to land on on the other side fall over, making me fall onto the fence beneath me, my pants getting caught, and me literally hanging off of the fence by my sweatpants. Somebody had to come help me rip my pants off the fence and my face was probably maroon by then.

It was awful. All of it. Awful.

And the most embarrassing night of my life.

6/30: Struggle

What's the hardest thing you've ever experienced?

College as a whole was by far the hardest thing I've ever experienced.

My freshman year started out with me going to UT and hating it before classes even started. I can't even put my finger on what made me hate it so much, but I can't help but believe it's because God never intended for me to go there. My freshman year ended a short 6 weeks after it began with me having to medically withdraw because of a serious case of mono. My mono was so bad that my liver got seriously messed up and my eyes started turning yellow. I remember my friend Austin saying, "I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eyes are turning yellow. Now I'm no medical expert, but I saw that happen on House the other night and it was bad news." I went home to a mom who was going through chemo treatments for breast cancer so we basically were just two sicklings, not allowed to touch each other, keeping each other company.

I took the spring semester off completely and just focused on getting 100% back to normal. The first semester of my "sophomore" year, I started at Tennessee Tech. I lived in an apartment with a girl I knew from church and one of the friends she had made freshman year. The first semester was great. I LOVED college and just knew that this was the experience I always wanted. I didn't do anything special, just typical college stuff, but I loved it.

The second semester of my sophomore year started a long, drawn out spiral down, down, down deep into sadness. To make a LONG story short, I ended up being kicked out of the group of friends I had made my first semester at Tech. These were my best friends then. The girls I did everything with. We talked about our weddings and bridesmaids dresses. Took spring break trips together. Ate together weekly. Did life together. To this day, I have no idea what happened or what I did to make it happen. All I know is that it hurt. Bad.

I've never felt so utterly and totally alone in my whole life.

I'd cry myself to sleep multiple nights a week. I lived in straight-up silence, going weeks without speaking to my roommate. I worked my schedule out where I was only there Monday afternoon-Thursday morning, but even that was too long for me. I tried to mend some relationships and thought there was a light at the end of the tunnel, only to find out I was wrong when I got engaged and no one cared enough to ask me how it happened.

I looked for ways out of Cookeville and Tech on a weekly basis, but God just kept closing doors right in my face. That's when I knew I had to finish school there and began begging Him to provide me with friends my last semester.

I worked my butt off the summer in between my 2nd and 3rd full years of school and took 15 hours at a community college so that I could take 20 my last semester and graduate a semester early. The Lord was SO GOOD to me and provided a sweet old couple with room for me to live with them during the week. I randomly reconnected with girls from high school I hadn't spoken to in years and they started inviting me to hang out with their friends a few nights a week. I was taking 20 hours, working 30 hours a week, and trying to plan a wedding so I couldn't always go, but they continued to invite me and include me the times I could. I don't know if they know how much that meant to me, but God used them to keep me going that last semester. I don't think I could've done it without them.

Since then, I've learned the Lord let all of that happen to me so that He could use it for His glory. I work with high school girls here and I'm able to tell them that no matter how lonely they feel, it will be ok. They'll make it out alive and the Lord is still good.

Back to School?

I'm a dork.

Like, a major dork.

Like, a dork that loves school so much she wants to figure out a way she can get her husbands degree for him because she misses it.

That kinda dork.

I'm done with school, but majorly want to go back. I love the tests. I love the studying. I love taking notes. I love it all.

I think it's because I learned to successfully reign in my ADD when it came to school. I'm failing miserably at that in the real world. But that's a different story.


I'd like to get my masters one day. In what, you ask? No idea. Not a fat clue.

Education sounds nice. I could teach public speaking at a high school. But then again, how many high schools in this economy can afford a public speaking teacher? They're not thinking about the fact it's the number one thing employers are looking for. Don't get me on going on that...

Or I could teach little ones. But I'm not sure I'm cut out for that. I like the idea of decorating a classroom, loving on little kids, having spring, summer, and winter breaks, all those good things, but I'm just not sure I can handle the grubby hands and snotty noses.

So, we'll see what ends up happening. All I'm saying is that if you see me wandering around Vol State with a short red wig on, just call me Clint.